Word of Mouth

Three things came together this week and as three is my lucky number that can only be a good thing.

Firstly, trudging up the muddy, snowy lawn I made a mental list of all the jobs that need doing in the garden. More chores? No, it wasn’t a feeling of burden, more a hopeful feeling; looking forward to Spring sunshine and new things growing.

It’s the same in gardens all around the world and my second thought was how important gardens are to the cycle of living …. and dying. Many health care professionals and anyone working in the caring sector will already know how important gardens are to a patient’s wellbeing and even recovery. Gardens in hospitals, care homes and hospices have a key role to play in not only how the patient feels but also the experience of family, friends and visitors. The gardens I’ve come across in these places are beautifully tended, often by volunteers, and well loved by children, adults, staff and visitors. They are not just places of peace and tranquillity but they signal that seasons come and go, plants die back in winter but there will be flowers again in Spring and Summer. They deeply connect with our sense of time passing but also our sense of hope and looking to the future. They are also places of fun and adventure, especially for children and siblings, they provide light relief from anything and everything to do with everyday life … and of course, death.  

And so to the third thing that made a lot of sense; the brilliant programme on Radio 4 by poet and author, Michael Rosen, exploring the language we use to discuss death. Just as the 2011 “Rev” Christmas special should be compulsory viewing for anyone contemplating becoming a vicar (see last month’s blog) so this episode of “Word of Mouth” should be on the syllabus for anyone planning to go into healthcare. Particularly insightful are Michael’s own observations about losing his son, who died suddenly from meningitis. The contributions from teachers and hospice workers also paint a picture of a scene very familiar in schools and hospices but one which shouldn’t be underestimated in terms of its power in allowing a person to find words for their feelings. Talking one to one with a child is important but often the real talking comes when you get a group of children, around a table, glue and paper and crayons everywhere and they are thoroughly and happily engaged in something that isn’t painful or incomprehensible. The power of that simple activity to free up the mind and allow a child to chat is a wonderful thing. Play specialists and trained counsellors already know that sitting side by side with a child, cutting out or colouring in, can result in some really positive conversations as part of the healing process. It’s funny how the simplest things can often have the most impact on our wellbeing, bit like waiting for the snowdrops to come up.   

More listening and learning

Guest Blogger

Lynne Wilson

BBC Radio 4, Word of Mouth. The language of bereavement and grief are explored by writer Michael Rosen, as 

he talks to psychologists, teachers, hospice workers and children’s charities.

Thrive –  a national charity that uses gardening to promote wellbeing for the disabled. Activities focus on the benefits of gardening to individuals and organisations